I have discovered the joy of iTunes

July 3, 2006 at 1:50 pm (Uncategorized)

Until now I have been happy just uploading my own CDs to it but now have finally bitten the bullet and downloaded my first tune and what a corker it was. Some obscure dance anthem that was played on repeat on the screens before a certain boy band came on stage at a recent tour.

Whether it shall appear on the forthcoming ‘Howard Donald’s House Mix CD’ (you think I’m making that up don’t you) is uncertain. Perhaps in a special sealed section? 

“They live in a house. A very big house in the…. Erm…. City”  

I work in a leafy suburb of Newcastle i.e. an inner city area but an inner city area with delusions of grandeur. These are not your average townies they are far more special than that (although they would like to discount the numerous scruffy students living in the area from their ranks I am sure). Every second car you see is a 4×4, never destined to get an ounce of dirt on them though of course as they are reserved purely for the hundred yard school run before they are returned to their rightful place, usually blocking most of the pavement.  

Though it seems polluting the environment with unnecessarily large cars is not enough for these wanabee country-dwellers. They need to emphasise their bonds with their countryside brothers with their choice of car sticker. Now for most aspiring social climbers car stickers would be seen as a no no perhaps on a par with England car flags but it seems a certain kind are acceptable here, namely ones promoting such idyllic pastimes as the shooting and hunting of defenceless animals. The fact that the nearest these lot get to wildlife is the rats that pollute their rubbish-strewn streets is perhaps lost on them. Slogans like “keep your bull s*** in Westminister” litter their car windows. “honk if you hunt” is sure to follow as well as Barbour jackets and Burberry Wellingtons.

Snide of course.  

Evolution of a Geordie 

Day one- Baby is born

Day two- Pierce their ears

Day three- Introduce them to Greggs pasties 

We know how to breed them up there.

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